A couple weeks ago I got a call from Gabriel's student teacher. He's gotten in trouble a lot with her. They've kinda come to some common ground, but I think she'd be an ideal teacher for a class of girls. I haven't seen that she understands boys are just flat out different than girls. She mentioned he'd gotten caught in the bathroom during lunch screaming at the top of his lungs along with another kid. I asked which kid, she told me the name, and I knew Gabriel hanging around with this kid was not a good idea. I shared this with her and explained that we're trying to teach him not to be a follower, but that's exactly what he is at this stage. She said she would switch the seating arrangement in class to limit interaction between these two. Gabriel mentions that this kid gets red almost everyday. Then she told me that several girls had told her that during lunch recess Gabriel was hitting them really hard. I was NOT happy to hear this and told her that it would be addressed at home.
Later, I picked him up. He reported he'd been on green all day during school. I gave him a hug and asked how lunch went because I'd heard he didn't have green then. He looked down and knew he was busted. I asked what in the world he was thinking by screaming in the bathroom. His response, "I don't know ------ started it." So, we talked about not copying other people's bad choices. He seemed receptive. I told him if he can't make good choices around ------ then maybe he should play with other kids, like kids that are on green all the time. He agreed that was a good idea.
I asked why he was hitting girls hard on the playground. This is how he explained it..."Mom, they surrounded me and said chipmunk soup, chipmunk soup, chipmunk soup over and over. I didn't like them saying that and couldn't get out unless I hit them." "What's wrong with saying chipmunk soup?" "It's a witch thing!" I'm thinking, 'Great what the heck are they talking about on the playground?' "How do you know it's a witch thing?" (In a semi hushed but forced whisper) "I
just know it." That mind of his never stops working...
I told him he's skinny enough to squeeze out and run and play near a teacher next time. It is NEVER ok to hit especially girls. I asked him if he'd ever seen Daddy hit Mommy even when Mommy made Dad really mad. He looked at me like I was crazy and said,
"NO". Had he seen Papa hit Nanny? No. Had he seen Mr. ------ (his principal) hit any teachers because they had kids in their classes being naughty? No. Did he think Jesus hit girls that said rude things to him and hurt his feelings? No. We discussed some strategies for managing the girls on the playground and how to avoid them bothering him in the future.
I hope he doesn't get sent on his mission to Kentucky or somewhere that they actually eat chipmunk soup, he'll be traumatized all over again. :-)
